Untitled

Next week I'll go back to posting actual posts. As in, with words. For now, though, I had to post a few photos I snapped today. My words are pretty much hollow in comparison, anyway.

a few more, here. 

GGC

Thankful

Hope you had yourself a moveable feast...

And caught yourselves a decent family picture.

GGC 

Gratuitous Face

a post-breakfast stretch-sesh

Fable's "why are you always looking at me like that" face. 

I took this last photo with my cell phone so the quality totally sucks but I couldn't help posting it. I love it. I love her. I love you. I love your children. I love your shoes. I love everybody and everything amen. 

GGC

Holiday Travel, Weight Loss, and a Very Special Surprise!

Today on Momversation, Holiday Travel Funtime! Asha from Parenthacks talks Holiday Blahs with Maggie, Mindy and Me.



Speaking of the Holidays, is this time a year a bad time to try to lose 20-30 pounds of baby weight? Because... I wasn't really thinking about that when I decided on this week as week one of Operation Lose the Baby Weight and Be Hot Again... Duh, Bec. Duh.

Those following me on twitter and/or facebook might have heard the news but I had to break it here, anyway: Archer pooped on the potty for the first time yesterday (which coincidentally was the day he turned 3 1/2. Archer's always been a numbers guy but still... Weird, right?). Archer also chose last night to sleep for the first time without a pacifier. Ever in his life. I'm serious. This is big, people. This is huge. Bust out the Champagne and low-calorie snacks and let's freak nasty on the party bus! 

GGC

Look Deeper

Sometimes I have a hard time, as many of us do, looking deeper. We tend to believe what we do without consequence. We fight wars within our homes and ourselves, often oblivious to whom and what we are fighting. We jump on bandwagons because we are told to by the media, our friends, respected individuals. But we seldom look deeper. Ask questions. About the people and things we curse and hate and disagree with. About the industries who have "screwed us over" or "brought on their own demise."

The Internet is hugely effective. It has the power to unite and divide but most importantly it has the power to enlighten. Causing people to look deeper into themselves by venturing across county, state and even international lines. The online world has no borders. We are all connected.

I was quietly annoyed this week by the mass hysteria surrounding one tasteless commercial. I'm sorry but really? Is this REALLY an issue worth fighting? I find it hard to believe that mothers are more offended by this commercial than they are by their peers for responding so militantly against it. It seems to me that there are much worthier issues to be militant about. Stories to tell and eyes to open to what fixable injustices are going on in our communities, country and world at large. 

Which is why I thought it so important to direct your attention to this post.

Before reading this, I was vehemently opposed to the "bailing-out" of the big three car companies, basing my opinion on what I'd heard from CNN and NPR correspondents who like most of us, dwell outside the decomposing walls of Detroit. 

Thank you, Jim for changing my mind and forcing me to look deeper. And thanks to all of you who use your voices to inspire, educate and enlighten those of us who don't know any better but to skim the surface. 

GGC

Love and Marriage

Above is the photo that accompanies this month's Rockabye excerpt in Babytalk Magazine, which I first saw several weeks ago and thought, "Whoa! We really love each other don't we?" I mean, come on! You can't fake those loving stares, even if I do look cross-eyed. Cross-eyed with LOVE! Hal and I don't have many photos together (In fact I just searched my photos and the last photo of the two of us I could find was this one, taken last Christmas at a sweater party) so it was kind of nice seeing how happy we look together.

Stating the obvious of course but still, I gotta say it: marriage is tough. Being a wife is FAR more difficult than being a mother. Screw 4am feedings and potty training. That shit be easy compared to keeping one's marriage from going off, grenade style.

Little known fact? Hal and I came *this* close to not being married anymore a great many times during our first two years together. Mind you, we only knew each other for a few months before we wed/became parents but STILL! Marriage is hard no matter the circumstances. Can I get an, AMEN!?

This is our one and only wedding photo, taken at The Little White Chapel, Las Vegas, Jan 22, 2005. I was five months pregnant and Hal and I had known each other for a whopping nine months. P.S. Those plants behind us? They're fake.

I am proud to say that in our case, hard work has absolutely paid off and the last four years of sweat and tears (that rhymed! ) have been well-worth the awesome that is our marriage today.

Which gets me to thinking... perhaps the only way to truly love someone is to hate them first. Not that I ever hated my husband but you know what I mean. We had our downs looooong before we had our ups.

I look at that silly, glossy photo above and think, "Wow. We made it out alive." I also think, "Wow, Hal. You were having a very interesting facial hair day..." But SEE!? I can totally say that because Hal knows that loving someone is calling them out on silly shit which is why I don't mind when Hal tells me to my face that my feet smell and to "please for the love of God, get them the hell away from me, because GROSS, Bec. Gross!"

Anyway, this post is about marriage. MARRIAGE. Because everyone deserves cross-eyed photo spreads with their weirdly bearded spouses and coming *this* close to divorcing only to make it out the other end more in love than ever with stinky feet. I never thought I'd say this because I hate the word "wife" but... I really do love being married.

Which is why I'm so proud and excited that YOU, my wonderful readers, participated in last weekend's "Prop 8 Sucks Ass" rallies. Here are your posts, photos and videos:

Minneapolis, MN
photos c/o Miss Mish on flickr

Orlando, FL
photo set c/o Pacing the Panic Room on flickr
Blog post, here.

New York, NY
photos c/o Julia

San Diego, CA
Blog post c/o Wonderspot

Reno, NV
Blog post c/o Sara McGinness

Los Angeles, CA
video c/o RutCarter

Providence, RI
photo c/o the lovely, Karen

Pasadena, CA
blog post c/o Clueless but Hopeful, here.

Palm Springs, CA
blog post c/o Punk Rock Mom, here
flickr set, here

Chicago, IL
blog post c/o Miss Begail, here
Flickr set, here.

Pretty inspiring, right?

Thank you all so much for sharing. You're beautiful and I'd bet money that your feet don't smell even a little bit.

To marriage, then! To marriage:

2006

2007

2008

GGC

P.S. Thank you, Cafemom for the awesome Rockabye write-up. I bet your feet don't smell, either.

Guilt and the Working Mom

Ah, yes. Guilt and the working mom. I'm pretty sure we all feel the burn trying to balance career with family every second of our lives from time to time. Today's momversation fronted by Heather and featuring Alice, Mindy and me, talks balancing work with motherhood. 

How do you balance it all? Does hope guilt spring eternal in the human breast? Is it an inescapable part of being a mother? Do you fathers feel it too?

GGC

P.S. Talking co-sleeping and how much I CAN'T GET ENOUGH OH MY GOD over here. 

... because I can't help but talk about sex any chance I get.

Every episode of Momversation is fronted by a different panelist's question. I'm thinking sex is way more exciting to girltalk about than parenting (but that might have something to do with the fact I have a parenting blog and let's be honest, talking about being a mom can get old) so here I go again.  The words "pussy," "vagina," and "cockandballs" have been removed by the forces that be but don't worry, the segment is STILL worth watching. Especially because Fable makes a cameo appearance, which, I mean... who doesn't love that?

Today's lovely-lady panelists include Heather from Dooce, Nataly from Work-It Mom and Mindy from The Mommy Blog. 

Talk dirty to me, people. How has your sex life changed since having kids? Do you see your body as less sexual? More sexual? Explicit details, please. 

GGC

Babies' First Protest Rally

updated to add: if you attended a rally in your state either alone or with your family, please post links to your flickr sets and/or blog posts in the comments below (be sure to include your city/state) so I can link to you and your photos/words. The family that fights assholery together gains my utmost respect. To quote my girlfriend, Bjork, all is full of love and no one has the right to change that. 

a few more photos, here. 

GGC

Mo' Momversation

Talking about my vag, today, per usual on Momversation with Daphne, Mindy and Asha! re: Vaginal birth vs. C-Section:



And be sure to check out the other episodes that debuted this week, "Do You Use Food as a Reward for Your Kids?" and "What do You Do When You Disagree with your Partner's Parenting Decisions?

Also your comments on my last post(s)? Amazing. I want to make out with each and every one of you. Hard. 

GGC

Epiblogues: Amen

I seem to have angered a lot of people with my last post and honestly? That was what I wanted. I wanted to isolate those of you who voted for Prop 8. I wanted you to feel like complete and utter shit because it was your vote that took away the rights of the people I love, including my best friend.

But after some thought, I realize now that it was wrong of me.

After all, if I believe in fighting intolerance, I can only do so by loving the opposition. That has always been the only way to win a debate amicably and while I will not apologize for what I wrote in my last post, I will acknowledge that I was unkind to many of you and for that I'm sorry. I apologize if I hurt your feelings.

I take this issue very seriously and I'm disappointed and incredibly sad that a number of my loyal blog readership, good people, would take something so precious away from my very best peeps.

So as I was coming from a place of anger, please know that I was also coming from a place of passion and protectiveness. It is my duty as a friend to fight the bullies. Proposition 8 is exactly that.

I'd like to think that each and every one of you would be just as pissed if equal rights were taken away from your best friends. Your family. And that you might even, without thinking twice about the ramifications, hurt some feelings trying to protect them.

GGC

Amen

This weekend Hal and I are taking our kids down to city hall to march against Prop 8. I participated in Saturday night's rally kidless but feel very strongly that my kids should be with Hal and me on Saturday, participating in a fight for what's right.

Frankly, I've had a hard time writing about anything else this week, still in shock am I over Prop 8's passing. In shock that there are people who read my blog that supported it. A great part of me wants to tell them all to go away. Take your hate and get the fuck off my property... But of course, I cannot blame anyone for being misguided. So I make signs, instead. Stand by my friends.

(more photos from Saturday night's prop 8 rally in Hollywood/Silverlake, here.)

I invite all of you to participate in this weekend's NATIONWIDE Prop 8 protests* for your LGBTG friends as well as your children. Because one day they won't even be able to believe that in their lifetime such bigotry and hate existed. Because of you and your willingness to fight.

I believe very strongly that love CAN conquer all and that it will with the support of good people with equal opportunity hearts.



What he said.

GGC

*click here for nationwide locations!

He Loves Me. He Loves Me Not.

Lately Archer has had quite the fickle heart. Never mind that he seems to have a new girlfriend at school and his imaginary friend has all but disappeared. He goes back and forth between showering me with kisses and hugs and kicking my ass. Luckily my transition committee was fully prepped by friends and family who warned me of what I would soon be up against when Fable appeared on the scene. 

And now? I'm learning to love life with my bipolar three-year old who in the blink of an eye goes from sweet to scary. 

Luckily, his lashing out has only been at me and his father. Archer adores his sister and spends most of his time as close to her as humanly possible. If he could his mouth would be permanently pressed to Fable's forehead and every night I have to pull him kicking and screaming to bed because "NO MOMMY! I WANT TO CUDDLE WITH FABLE!..." which is totally cute but I draw the line at cuddling with Fable past 10:00pm, which, yes, I admit, is Archer's bedtime but only because he's napping from 4-7 right now. (Don't even try to talk me out of naptime. Naptime is a very important time for all of us and when it is taken away? Terrible things happen.)

Of course, amidst the chaos of two children-dom, there are moments that make it worth it times infinity. Times like today, when Archer, Fable and I fell asleep on the couch together in a heap like a bunch of puppies. Times when Archer forgets he's at war with me and goes back to his formerly sweetness-and-nose-boogered self.

Times when Archer smiles at me and tells me he loves me. Right before he slugs me in the face. 

 

GGC

In other news, morning playdates are quickly becoming pre-dinner meet-ups. I guess this is what life is like with two small children. 

Infant Jest

Miss Fable : Five Weeks Ancient (Dress c/o Auntie J!)

Several weeks ago I decided that because  Archer's first few years are/have been documented in a book, I would make Fable her own version in music videos, highlighting shiny moments in Fable's early life. (Beginning with her Prologue, of course.)

Without further ado Volume One, Chapter One, "Infant Jest":

*This comes a week late, I do realize. Then again, what is time? 

**Musical Credit: I'm not Gonna Teach Your Boyfriend by: Black Kids (which also happened to be track one on the GGC Push Mix.) 

GGC

First

"You haven't written about Archer in a while," my mother said to me yesterday when she came up for the day to visit.

"Yes I too have!" I said. 

But wait... was she right? Was I writing more about Fable than Archer? I certainly am spending more time with Fable... OH MY GOD!  Is this what happens? Am I scarring him for life? Does he feel less loved? 

I spent the most part of last night telling Archer over and over that I loved him. He finally pushed me away from him and said "NOOOO! STOP!" 

BUT I STILL LOVE YOU AS MUCH AS I ALWAYS HAVE AND ALWAYS WILL AND FABLE IS NOT HERE TO REPLACE YOU AND YOU'LL ALWAYS BE MY BABY FOREVER AND EVER UNTIL I DIE!!! AHHHHHH!!!

The truth is? He has every reason to be angry and upset and regressing in the bathroom department, throwing puzzle pieces at my face et al. Try as I might, with a baby attached to my person 24/7, my first child has become my second priority. 

Archer colors California red, rebelling already.

I'm sorry, dude. I'm really trying. I swear. 

GGC

*In other news, blogging about Fable again and how much I love her and OH MY GOD, Archer. I owe you a drink. Apple juice on the rocks, perhaps? Milk with a chocolate garnish? 

**Also, second episode of Momversation is up! Are your online friends as important as your real life friends? 

Five Weeks

Dear Fable,

Today you are five-weeks old, and I'm posting this picture five minutes after I snapped it of you in my lap, where you are now sleeping...

...with your five fingers peeking out from the top of your blanket and your five toes wiggling against the rolling flesh of my belly and one day when I ask, you will give me five. Down low. Too slow! and we will go on five mile hikes in the hills and ride bikes at 5mph and at 5:00pm, when the light is just perfect in the late summer months, we'll go on family nature walks with your brother who will, far too soon, be five years old (as will you be) and the dogs who I hope will be with us by then. 

For now, though, you are this tiny little person, who wakes at 5am to eat and falls asleep against me.  Five weeks old, you are captured in the photo above, taken five minutes ago. Wait. Now its been six. Seven...

One day, this photograph will look nothing like you, which is why I keep taking pictures. A hundred thousand photos so I can capture your infancy like a butterfly and keep you flapping forever in my heart. 

 GGC

We (Will) Evolve

Today I rejoice for Obama but I also mourn for Proposition 8's sinister win. It seems that just as we've taken two steps forward as a nation by electing Barack Obama as President we have also taken two steps back in the state of California, a place that, until today, I have been proud to call home for twenty-six years.

Obama made history yesterday but as he stepped forward into the light, monsters were still lurking in the darkness. As we came together to rejoice the change in the direction of America, a different kind of change was being decided upon -- a change in the state constitution to remove the right for same-sex couples to marry. Good people. My friends.

And because of Proposition 8 passing, I found myself unable to fully celebrate last night. And today I feel robbed of the pride I should be feeling. The hope I should have for my country.

Last night was momentous and I couldn't help but think, as I clinked champagne glasses with those of my friends, my daughter in my arms and son at my feet, that this would be a night I would remember always. A defining moment in the history of this country and in my life.

As the first family stepped onto the stage I marveled at the unification the Obamas signified. The personification of equality and change. The fact that TODAY it is possible for ALL parents in the United States, regardless of race and ethnicity to BELIEVE when they tell their children, "sky's the limit!"

Unfortunately, when it comes to Gay rights, we're still stalled on the tarmac. And when the champagne bottles had all been emptied and we had finished hugging each other goodbye, I felt a certain sadness overtake me, a feeling of shame. One I wanted desperately to replace with the hope and pride I felt watching Obama take the stage with his family.

I spoke to my mother, last night, who said to me "when we were children, we would have never guessed that in our lifetime we would see a black U.S. President. It's extraordinary to see how far, as a nation, we've come."

And I thought to myself, hopeful, that perhaps one day, when my children are old enough to participate in an election, they might call me to rejoice over the election of the first openly gay President of the United States.

That I might look back on this day, and like my own mother, marvel at how far we've come.

Because indeed we can come together and evolve as a nation. But as Obama said so eloquently in his acceptance speech, there is still work to be done.

For now, I'll keep fighting and believing in the NECESSITY that is equal rights for ALL men and women, and I will, as they say, cling to hope.

To quote my new President, "yes we can!"

And I encourage all of you to join hands and fight until we do.

GGC

Hope Springs Eternal

Vote today. Change tomorrow.

GGC

Momversation, Episode One & Win a Guitar!!!

***Updated with Winner, below!!***

I'm excited to announce that along with some INCREDIBLE Blogger-ladies  (Heather of Dooce, Alice of Finslippy Maggie of MightyGirl, Asha of ParentHacks, Daphne of Cool Mom, Nataly of Work-It Mom, and Mindy of The Mommy Blog) I've been asked to participate in a new web series called "Momversation" which will be airing three times a week for the next few months. I'll be posting episodes here on GGC. You can also check us out on the Momversation site and/or on Yahoo Shine. 

Without further ado, fronted by the lovely and rockstaresque, Heather: and featuring Alice, Daphne y yo tambien: Episode One, "I Love You, But I Hate Your Politics"...

*Please be kind. The camera just added ten pounds to the extra twenty I'm packing. Oy. 

Wanna participate in the Momversation and be eligible for a prize? Tell me how YOU deal when your family disagrees with your politics. One commenter will be picked at random to win this kid-sized acoustic guitar c/o First Act's Discovery line for rock-n-roll kids!

(Archer has the not-so-fancy but just as awesome First Act guitar featured, here. )

GGC

.........................................

This month's (November) issue of Babytalk Magazine features an excerpt from Rockabye, entitled, "Coming Home." Strange reading it, now, with Fable in my arms. Two VERY different baby homecoming experiences. Oh, life... Check it, here!

*** Congratulations to kiwidebra! Please contact me to claim your fabulous prize!***

Joe the Plumber, Ashley Todd, Avril Lavigne and Puff the Magic Dragon Walk Into a Bar...

Introducing Hal as Joe the Plumber!!!

Joe rocks his safety goggles like a TRUE AMERICAN!


Bec as Ashley Todd!!!

Hope? Try... uh, Nope.

See? The B isn't backwards, I swear! Oh, wait...

Ashley Todd + Joe the Plumber = GOP Love.

Archer as Puff the Magic Dragon!!!!

Puff the Magic Dragon lives by the Hollywood sign...

...And does his own face makeup.

And let's give a BIG GGC Halloween welcome to... AVRIL LAVIGNE!!!

"When you feed me formula it makes me so constipated!"

"I feel like babies dressed as pop-stars on Halloween are undder-aaaaaaaated..."

"Yes I'm cute! In my boots! And my suit!..."

"Now if you'll just whip out your boob and feed me. So effing long I've waitteeeeed..."

Yeah, yeah, yeah...

GGC

P.S.

True.