Exhibit A:
Me: "Husband! Right there! It's Ali G in the House: The Holiday Special!"
Husband : (backtracking channels) "Um. You mean Mohammed Ali: A Retrospective?"
Me: "Oh. Really? It looks like..."
Exhibit B:
Me: "Wow! Close Football game! 14 to 16... Very close."
Husband: "Actually, its 6 to 34."
Me: "Really? (squinting) It looks like..."
Exhibit C:
(blowing up MS draft to 24pt so I can read it without eyes watering)
Husband: "I can read what you are writing from across the room. Are you ok?"
Me: "Just making things easier, my friend."
Exhibit D:
Me: "I just accidentally plucked my entire right eyebrow right off my face."
Husband: "I think you need to go in for an eye exam."
So last week I made an appointment with the local Optometrist and walked my ass over, Archer in tow. We sat down together in the eye-exam-chair-from-hell and got my eyes examined. The optometrist ripped me a prescription for a pair of glasses and Archer and I picked out a pair of dork-chic Prada frames to complete my new set of eyes.
I cannot complain. I have always secretly wanted to wear glasses. I think they are damn sexy on men and gals alike and now I can join the bookish/silverlake hipster/intellectual elite. Another interesting thing about getting glasses is that my IQ has risen at least 17 points.The moral here is that I guess some post-pardum changes aren't so bad. To hell with 20/20 vision, anyway. Soooooo overrated.I embrace my dork-chic and am now off to complete my new look with a couple pairs of Varvatos shoelaceless Chuck Tailors and some intense three hour line-waiting with Archer in front of the Troubadour.
GGC
11 comments:
OK, that one definitely needs to go on the list. Nice frames! Welcome to the world of the sight-challenged. And glasses DO make your IQ higher. In the past I have been approached at school and asked for help on perfect stranger's homework based on the fact that I was wearing glasses and "looked smart". I kid you not.
Glasses are *also* very fun for babies to pull off and chew on. Oh, and just a tip: you might not want to "store" your glasses on the floor of the baby's room during a restless-sleep night. D'OH
yeah. Archer has already mastered the "removal of the glasses to eat them" and it was only cute the first time. Now I have to carry him six inches away from my body at all times.
I like the new rims, but pregnancy had the opposite effect on me. I used to wear glasses and post-Bean, I never use them.
I miss them, not the not being able to see part, but the glasses, yes.
Although, I would most definitely prefer to have lost some more eyesight versus gaining the extra roll around the middle.
You look HOT, baby! Fab frames..
Wow Bex, you're quite foxy in those specs.
Glasses are totally sexy. I know because I wear them, too. But not all the time. I like to go from intellectual sexy to stripper sexy. Keep Husband coming back for more.
You look hot!
Aw, yeah. glasses are totally the new thong.
I've wanted glasses for years. I even got blank frames in college. still perfect vision though, and I can no longer justify wear glasses I don't need.
your glasses look great.
they look good!!!
ok and I have to add it's just not fair that you can write AND you're gorgeous..not fair t'all..
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